Unresolved frustration breeds bitterness, and resentment, and loneliness, and disconnection .... And and and and nothing good!! When we are frustrated with our partners it is easy for this to escalate into negative thoughts about them as people, incorrect assumptions and unkind labels such as “you are so selfish”! I have found generalised superlatives such a “you always” and “you never” wedge a big space between us. Invariably one of us will be on the attack and the other on
Expectation has been referred to as The Silent Killer of all relationships.
I have an expectation that after a long week of feeling like passing ships in the night with our busy work schedules, that a full weekend spent together will be my reward. But in reality weekends are just as busy, sometimes with more work and other times with life that you couldn’t get to in the week and these keep us from spending the amount of time together we would like to.
I admit that in that
“Is there hope for me/us”, is what clients are really wanting to know when they ask “will I be okay?”, “do other couples likes us make it?”, “does it get any better?”. Counselling is often the last straw of hope that clients grasp when their marriage is on the rocks or when their hole of hopelessness has become too dark and scary to exist in alone. It didn’t take me long to realise that I am in the business of giving hope. I am very intentional about my use of hope based stra
The real act of marriage takes place in the heart, not in the ballroom or church or synagogue. It's a choice you make - not just on your wedding day, but over and over again - and that choice is reflected in the way you treat your husband or wife. ~ Barbara De Angelis Pre-marital Counselling is a compulsory component of marriage preparation in many religious communities but I believe all couples, regardless of faith or faithlessness considering marriage, should attend premarr
Contrary to popular belief, I believe a good time to start therapy may be when your life is going relatively well! Therapy is often associated with crisis, on the brink, neurosis, and the final straw (and therapy is certainly important when you’re in that place), but therapy shouldn’t just be the cure... when it’s capable of possibly preventing the breakdown in the first place and maintaining your happy place. Seeing a Counsellor early on in your marriage, or better yet befor